• Had many years of startup mentality
• Gained a lot of insights, product fit, polish, mvp balance, learning to code actually got me into my workplace now
• started a new system called CL-AIR but then looked at mountain of work
• It’s not my CEO era. I’m at my suburban dad era

This is an interesting start of the year for me. Up until recently I’ve had much of a long-term mindset in the idea of having my own start-up. I’ve been interested in business and the idea of developing my own business was intreging, as it was a way that i’d be able to help people in some way and make a living out of it.

I never quite made my own thing. Ideas came by with different levels of suitability, but I’ve never felt the need to take the plunge. Unfortunately for me, I actually quite like my employer, so there’s more at risk if i were to go out on my own.

There were many things i learnt from having the start up mindset. I learnt a lot about business, and about product, and about polish and readiness. These were all things that I actually got to use to get into my current job Octopus-Energy/Kraken-Tech.

I actually thank a lot of my current successes, to the amount of research and learning I put into start-ups - even if i don’t do my own, I still learnt how to thrive in somebody else’s business, so that is good enough for me.

One of my most recent ideas actually came from my sister, and it was the creation of the CL-AIR system. It provided a way for me to build a little saas platform that would allow me to operate and assist with my sister’s ability to pay bills, and I actually had inspirations to move on and help other people in similar disadvantaged situations. My sister readily paid me for it, and some of her friends wanted to get on too.

But looking at this idea (and, to me, this was going to be the one) I would have to drop my comfy life and dedicate myself to helping people through my software and business operations. There was a mountain of legal paperwork I’d have to wade through before i could even open up shop. Not to mention the battle of marketing i’d have to try and convince people to sign up, only to get a buck from them each month.

Looking at the options, my family, the legal paperwork, the struggles, I decided that it’s the right thing to do, but just not right now.

I am not in my CEO Era, I am in my suburban Dad era.

When I think about what i want to do and what would fill me with joy, it’s actually to:

• Have a home that I can call mine, and look after it, improve and maintain
• Play with kids and watch them grow into successful adults
• Provide shelter, and food, and culture, and experience, to my family
• Rest, relax, read random things, build random things, paint random things.

None of these scream “Be a CEO right now” nor do I need to be a CEO for these things to happen. Actually, with my current salary, I’m closer than I’ve ever been to fulfilling these things. I don’t want to burn the candles at both ends just for some vague notion of becoming a CEO and helping others.

So I decided to drop the CL-AIR system for now: I’m still doing it for my sister but it doesn’t need to be anything more than that for now. It also allows me to assess the long term value of the idea anyway.

Since my mind has been unburdened by “a project” i can readily pick up a new one; but this time i didn’t want to do a business project. I think I love my free time too much, especially with the kids. There’s some things i want to make with them, and the fun we have together.

I did, however, have a vivid dream one night recently, that became such a loose story in my head that I want to have a chance to write it down. I don’t know why i’m particularly gripped by it, it’s a book, it’s fun, it’s exciting, and I can write it at my own pace, so i can make it fit around the kids. My mind is constantly adding and revising and modifying the story, so I have some real excitement to this project of mine, and I’m no longer stiffled by business suits (or worse, jeans and a tee).

The only issue might be that i’m writing too much (managing a blog and a book) but i’ll add more to my writing system later.